Orkut.com is a sheer waste of time. It's such a dreary, depressing place that you feel like drowning yourself in a sea of color #D9E6F7. But no, it ain't gonna be quick. Just so that you 'Stay beautiful', they'll bid you farewell by sticking a donut up your behind - the same donut which was snatched from your very hands moments ago. And oh, it does not know how to count. So the number of suicide attempts in your profile would still read zero, even after you've killed yourself.
51.28% of the users on Orkut.com are from Brazil. Foda-se idiotas! And no, friend requests from half-naked Brazilian chicks does not make it a better place. I mean, Brazil is a developing nation, right? 73.46% of their youth is wasting precious time on the Internet barfing on Orkut.com. Shouldn't they be doing something more productive? Umm, like reading this and this. Even surfing for pr0n would qualify as a productive activity (remember this?). However, sending friend requests to the sex-starved population of another developing nation, does not! If you're a totally hot drop-dead gorgeous Brazilian chick, please stop sending friend requests to us. If I come across another one of those 'Eu quero ser seu amigo' messages anywhere, I'm going to file a public interest litigation in the International Court of Justice accusing you guys of conspiring against our youth. I know. Netagiri. Totally rocks!
Of course, there is the flip side. You stay in touch with your long lost friends, bakar around on random forums and browse through hot wumans' albums, write kilobyte long testimonials to your friends, add people to your hawt-list and crush-list (super-awesome), and in general keep refreshing your scrapbook every n seconds (n α 1/orkut_addiction_index).
Since Chuck Norris is too busy counting to infinity for the second time, I, keeping the interests of both parties in mind, declare 19th September, 2008 as the International Deprecate your Orkut Account Day. Please make a note of it and stop using the darned thing.
Khuda Hafiz,
Sultan of Samarkand.
PS- No offense meant to Brazilian folks. The Amazon rainforest is totally awesome.
About Me
- Sultan of Samarkand
- Long years ago, the Amulet - the only earthly manifestation of His will - exercised its powers in the once glorious kingdom of Samarkand. It crafted the history of human civilization. Then it became part of it. History became legend. Legend became myth. And for four thousand and eight years, the amulet passed out of all knowledge. Until when chance came, it fell into the hands of a young rider from beyond the mountains - from the land of legend, magic and sorcery. Destiny took its course and the kingdom was restored to its rightful owner. To the The Sultan of Samarkand.
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7 comments:
I totally feel you bro, Brazil, being a part of G5 and our 'close' friend shouldn't turn a blind eye to the Orkut-tian atrocities! International politics aside, and apart from the Brazilian angle, facebook's pretty much in the same state..
Great post man!
Inline..
"...I'm going to file a public interest litigation in the International Court of Justice..."
ROFL!
"..Please make a note of it and stop using the darned thing..."
Amen!
*Yawn*
@Shark why ppl are yawning too much in the blogosphere ?? :D
I agree, orkut sux :P
switch to facebook :)
@shark,
Sure. *yawn*.
@kulbir
You *yawn* and write post such as these. Boredom is what drives us bloggers!
@obelix
Facebook is a decent web 2.0 application. It's not as lame as orkut. Not just yet! :)
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